I think my body and AF have a thing together...

Either that or God just thinks it is hilarious to torture me every month. No wait..I know...it is because AF is just plain ole mean. She's a mean witch! Yep...

The spotting is gone. It was only a few spots once...yesterday at that. I put a tampon in just to be on the safe side and when I removed it...just a bit of brownish-errrr pinkish colored blood. Now I am spending my time obsessing over if this has happened before. I have come to the conclusion that yes it has just not in this manner. I have spotted before AF. It is usually on and off but pretty consistant. Once, the spotting stopped for a day or so and then AF didn't come until the evening...just when I thought I may have missed her. I don't know why my body does this to me.

The thing is she shouldn't get my hopes up like that. It's cruel! I was pretty darn sure the spotting was a prelude to AF. I even had mom pick me up some tampons from the store yesterday. I don't want to get my hopes up. I am very very very scared! For once I didn't stress during the TWW because I knew we failed this cycle with everything going on. The testing and preparing for the next round. Accepting that I need med's in order to properly ovulate. Planning for the IUI in February. Now it seems like it may be a possibility that it worked. Maybe we made a baby????

Babe took me to Walgreens to get pee sticks. He wants to know as bad as I do. Of course it is way too close to Christmas for me to not make that a gift to him if I am pregnant. So tomorrow as I am out and about I will pick up some things to make my gift up....you know just in case. RE appt. still scheduled for Wednesday. Maybe I won't have to go. Maybe God is creating a miracle within me. Because we all know...that certainly would be a miracle!

Am I weird because I stare?

I have recently noticed that in my completely obsessive "wish I were pregnant" state I have been staring at pregnant women. I mean it's bad enough that every 2 minutes I seem to become a magnet to "very" pregnant women but come on now...

I noticed today only because the poor girl caught me staring! But I am almost 100% sure that I have been exhibiting this weird behavior for a while now. I don't usually feel so bad when I am with Babe because he always notices them too and his weird behavior makes me feel somewhat less weird. However, I noticed today, that I stared at this girls belly in increments of time. It's not like I stare and stare and stare. No that wouldn't be me. I looked....looked again....looked again....looked again...and well, you get the picture. It's obsessive, so there!

Yeah, so as I reflect on my behavior I am wondering if I am completely obsessively weird or if I just really really want to be pregnant. You tell me....